After complicated break-up, How do I get back in love?
After having suffered, do you think you can no longer fall in love again? Breaking up is always hard to take, whether you’ve been in a relationship for a month or years.
Just digesting a break-up is not enough. You have to relearn how to love to move forward and meet new people. But meeting new women/men scares you because you don’t trust them anymore?
Tips for loving again after a break-up
1. Take your time
The break-up has undoubtedly been a blow to your ego. This is the reason why you went through unpleasant phases: denial, anger, hope, etc. But these phases are not the only ones you need to go through.
Men often remain in a phase of bitterness after a break-up: you are negative, you regret all the time spent with her, and you consider that it is time wasted.
You have to get past this mindset because you won’t be ready and available for your next story as long as you get stuck with these dark thoughts.
Imagine that your life would have been much better without your ex is constantly remake the world based on your past relationship.
Try not to think about what your life would be like if you weren’t in a relationship. Not all the roads we take the lead us to the destination we want.
As they say, “you can’t change your past, but you can learn from it.”
Learn to embrace your story, to design your life from the present moment rather than imagine what it would be like if you hadn’t met your ex.
Accept that your ex is not necessarily a wrong person or someone you have wasted time with, but simply a human person with qualities, faults, with whom you have come a long way.
Focus on what it has given you and how you can calmly take the next step in your life that is coming. By thinking this way, you will get the most out of your old relationship: the good times, the support you had, and the lessons you learned.
2. Take control of yourself to be desirable
When your ex-partner has criticized you a lot, cheated on you, sometimes you need to rebuild your self-confidence.
It is a crucial step: you must relearn how to love yourself to be confident.
Many men are afraid of being hurt again after a disappointment, and they run away from dating for fear of suffering again.
Realize that you deserve to be loved; you can love. You have the right to have attention, and you can generate that attraction to yourself.
Develop your inner game to regain self-confidence by following these tips:
Start eating properly. Of course, this will allow you to lose those few extra pounds. But a better diet will also boost your spirits.
Studies show that those who exercise regularly report feeling bad less often than others, even if their salary is much lower.
Do two to three sessions of at least 30 minutes per week, and you will benefit from a morale boost.
Take care of yourself. Don’t be afraid to take care of your body. There is no need to spend two hours in the shower, but take care of the visible parts: take care of your teeth, hands, and face.
It’s not ridiculous to take care of yourself and show off yourself, even if your friends are throwing things at you. You will feel more apt to meet new people!
Don’t feel sorry for yourself. Now that you are single, you are free to carry out your plans.
Plan activities that make you happy take over the projects you gave up. The condition of your happiness must be you, not the women you meet.
3. Socialize again
After being injured, men tend to withdraw into themselves. You indeed analyze your behavior, the reason why it didn’t work anymore, you play video games or watch lots of movies at home.
At first, it’s normal. But once the pain is over, you need to get back to socializing. Men are social creatures. You communicate with others; you share your experiences, you have physical contact. To recover from your break-up, you need to start dating again and lead a social life right.
You can’t believe in a couple again if you are left alone or if you walk around in circles in the same group of friends as your ex. Reconnecting with a more robust social life is necessary.
It’s the company of your friends and their good humor that will eventually pull you up. To be alone is to meditate on your sadness. To go out is to go up the slope without noticing it.
Get to know new people. Making new friendships will open up your horizons and allow you to move forward.
However, do not cut off all contact with your old mutual friends. But having one foot on the outside will allow you to go out without taking your head, without wondering if your ex will be there. You will meet girls without it affecting the mood of the group.
Build a more extensive social circle, and you will have more fun going out, which will lead to new encounters. When I was younger, I was in the same group of friends as my ex. When we broke up, I was stuck: going out with our friends put us in a difficult situation.
4. Learn from your mistakes
Haven’t you seen the signs that heralded the end of your relationship? You have suffered, but this is an important lesson, and you will be more vigilant next time. A painful break-up should allow you not to repeat the same mistakes. Relationship experience increases your chances of succeeding in your next story.
For example, when you feel that a problem is growing, you will act directly not to generate too much frustration, according to a survey conducted, 29% of women divorce because there are too many arguments.
With your expertise, you will know how to burst the access before the situation explodes. You will have the courage to tackle complex topics.
Reflect on what you have learned. It can be to set limits faster. To have more confidence in yourself. Listen to your intuition. To wait longer before moving in together. All of this knowledge will serve you well.
The experience will also allow you to question yourself.
You necessarily have some responsibility. If you’ve let your fears get the better of you or have any flaws that women hate, you need to work on it.
Your break-up allows you to pinpoint what is wrong with you. Too often angry? Disorganized? Pessimistic? Even if your ex has thrown your flaws in your face, take the time to think about it.
Ask your friends what they think. If you work on your flaws, you’ll be a better companion in your next relationship, and it’s more likely to last.
You will be better at setting your expectations in a relationship. One of the main problems for couples is not having the same plans and aspirations in life. Loving each other is not enough; a team is a joint project.
In the future, try to understand the women you meet before considering a relationship. With your experience, you will know how to start on a reasonable basis.
5. Accept the risk
The time you’ll be ready to love again is when you accept that love comes with risks. Of course, with your experience, your next relationship will be less risky than your previous stories because you will have learned what works and what does not.
But the main thing is to understand that you can never control everything in a relationship. You can still be hurt. Love is risky because the success of a story is never guaranteed.
Don’t let the fear of suffering work against you. Women like men who can commit.
Engaging with a woman is not just telling her that you love her; it also knows how to manage this commitment daily. You need to invest enough to build a real relationship, but not too much at the risk of losing everything when the story ends.
The goal of love is not to reduce risk to nothing. The goal is to accept this risk and maintain a rich life alongside your relationship that will allow you to bounce back.
Don’t set expectations too high: you will never find the perfect woman who will match your plans. On the other hand, you can find a balanced relationship between your hobbies and hobbies as a couple, between your aspirations and his.
These are the kinds of relationships that you need to take risks. They aren’t perfect, but you won’t regret it.
Conclusion: Be hopeful; you will find the right relationship!
