Have you ever noticed that other people’s words and opinions impact your decisions? Or are you constantly thinking about what you’ve heard from others, doubting your thoughts and feelings? Unfortunately, other people do not always advise us with sincere intentions.
Allowing others to influence your mood, thoughts, and choices can trap you. This can make you independent and turn you away from the path to your happiness. There are several ways to prevent other people from “settling in your head” and influencing how you live and what you think about.
9 habits that will help prevent other people from influencing you
1. Why does this person’s opinion matter to you
Think about it: would you go to the person you’re having a dialogue with for advice? Do his actions always seem rational, meaningful, and correct to you? If not, then you should be fine with his words. If you feel anxious about what they’ve heard, ask yourself why their opinions matter. Also, think about whether these people deserve your close attention.
2. Stay impartial
If someone tries to insult you to influence your opinion, try to restrain your emotions and remain an impartial observer. Not letting other people influence your feelings prevents them from getting into your head and influencing your decisions.
3. Don’t take anything personally
The way people behave towards you only shows who they are at heart. Don’t take cruelty, insults, or harsh words personally; don’t let others impose guilt on you. Please recognize that others’ behavior indicates their character and intentions. You can’t change them, but you can take it personally and determine whether it’s worth maintaining a relationship with someone.
4. Try to figure out the intentions
Understanding the other person’s intentions frees you from negativity. Once you determine why a person is trying to influence you, you will know how to react correctly to his words. For example, a friend tries to dissuade you from a relationship with some girl because he suspects she is not telling you the whole truth and is afraid that this will break your heart.
His motives are sincere and understandable, so it’s worth talking to him about both your own and his feelings. Another life example is a girl who is rude and insists on her own; if only you would do as she wants. V I S I T. A F R I N I K . C OM. The solution she imposes on you will be good for her and bring you new problems.
In this case, the motive for her actions may be selfishness and the need to get what she wants from you, which is manipulative and unacceptable behavior in a healthy relationship. If her intentions seem doubtful and insincere to you, do not give in to persuasion and stand firm on your own. After all, once you allow another person to influence your decision, you open up the opportunity for him to “sit on your neck.”
5. Don’t let comparisons get the better
It is not uncommon for people with whom we communicate to compare us with others to convince us of something or influence our actions. If someone tries to make you feel like a jerk because you are different from someone else or make the “wrong” choice, take it as an indicator that you are most likely not on the path with the person.
Those who want the best for you will be able to convey their opinion without humiliating you as a person. Remember that comparison is manipulation, and it reflects the proper attitude of other people towards you.
6. Step away from the situation
Imagine that your friend violates your set boundaries and deliberately provokes an argument. You should not prove your case by foaming at the mouth and showing emotions—perhaps your friend is trying to influence you.
The best thing you can do in such situations is to distance yourself from them, for example, to change the subject of the conversation or to indicate that you will not discuss certain things explicitly. But if you are misunderstood, the best way to distance yourself from an unpleasant dialogue is to create a physical distance by saying goodbye and going about your business.
7. Learn to recognize manipulations
They say that forewarned means armed. And when it comes to manipulation, this saying perfectly describes the strategy of behavior that you must adhere to. Figure out which manipulations are most often used by people trying to influence your decisions and behavior.
Be careful when communicating with them so as not to succumb to provocations and not doubt that you have decided. If you don’t know where to start, take a look at this article — in it, we talked about the most common methods of manipulation that others can resort to.
8. Get distracted by something positive
By giving in to emotions, we make bad decisions and allow the words of others to influence our thoughts. If you feel that you are starting to sink into the abyss of reflections and doubts after talking to someone, get distracted by something positive that requires your full attention.
You can go to the gym, glue a model airplane, start writing a humorous story, or play your favorite game. You will replace someone’s comments and unsolicited advice with a pleasant thing, which will help you not take other people’s words to heart and return to rethinking an unpleasant situation with a cold head.
9. Realize that someone else’s opinion does not matter
The only opinion that should influence your life is your own. If someone finds it necessary to impose their thoughts and point of view on you, nod, smile, and return to what matters to you. Even if a person talks about the case, his position is only sometimes proper for you. Always ask yourself: what point of view do I hold myself?
