As social creatures, people can learn behaviors and feelings from one another. Sadly, we unknowingly imitate both the good and the bad. Toxic behavior is a prime example.
On the other hand, if you identify early on that you have inherited them from others, you can swiftly improve. Here are a few indicators that you might have unintentionally adopted bad habits from friends and peers.
7 signs you’ve adopted harmful behavior
1. You’re always right
Nobody ever gets everything right 100% of the time. However, if you are accustomed to believing that your viewpoint is the only one that matters, this could indicate that you have adopted toxic behavior. Maybe it’s time to reconsider the circumstance and step back to understand it.
Consider this: who in your inner circle acts in this manner? Maybe your relatives are always foaming at the mouth to defend their interests and reprimanding others for making mistakes, claiming they would never tolerate it. Recall that nobody is flawless and that things are considerably more complicated than they appear.
To create wholesome relationships and feel happy, it’s critical to learn to listen to and respect the perspectives of others. Instead of always standing your ground, learn to accept when you are mistaken and be empathetic and understanding. This can help you become a better person and eliminate your harmful tendencies.
2. You’re playing blame game
It’s common in some families to place the blame for issues on one another rather than working through them together and reaching a settlement. After spending years in such a setting, it is simple to develop a pattern of conduct that results in “victim syndrome.” However, you become careless and unpleasant if you continually hold others responsible for your problems.
Speaking with you is difficult as there’s a great likelihood of escalating a conflict or being used as a scapegoat. Stop assigning blame if you want people to come to you and your bad feelings to go.
Acknowledge that, even if the issue originated elsewhere, you are a part of it and that it is your job to find a solution. This crucial stage creates opportunities for growth and transformation on the road to self-improvement.
3. You’re swimming in negativity
A negative outlook on life often forms because you communicate with its owners. It’s really hard to stay positive when everyone around you is unhappy with life. If you notice that you are constantly focusing on the worst, looking for flaws in other people, and are inclined to condemn them, it’s time to change your approach to existence.
Otherwise, you will turn into a toxic person who torments others and yourself. V I S I T A F R I N I K . C O M. Of course, it is important to recognize the negative, but at the same time, you need to learn to look for something positive, supportive, and inspiring. You must also avoid complaining and victimizing to maintain self-control and perceive this life more optimistically.
4. You don’t listen to others
Listening is more than just looking at someone and listening to their speech. It is about empathy and showing support. But if, when communicating with someone, you are just waiting for your turn to speak out instead of really listening to the person, this may be a sign that toxicity is emerging in you.
It doesn’t always appear because of narcissism or self-esteem skyrocketing. We do not listen to others because they often judge and offend us or do not take our words seriously. In any case, it is important to correct toxic communication before it becomes the norm for you. When talking to someone, try to talk and listen equally. This will make other people feel heard and appreciated, improving your relationship.
5. You solve conflicts in a roundabout way
When you communicate with toxic people for a long time, you can adopt a conflict resolution strategy from them. It’s about finding a million ways to get around difficult conversations and starting to influence other people’s behavior through manipulation. Sometimes, it’s just a way to talk to relatives and colleagues “in the same language.”
But if solving conflicts in a roundabout way becomes a habit, then expect trouble and problems. Difficult conversations are scarier in our heads than in reality. And if you constantly avoid them, you can turn both your life and the lives of those you care about into a series of insults and misunderstandings. That’s why it’s important to learn how to resolve conflicts healthily and not be shy about talking about your needs and expressing emotions.
6. You’re competing with everyone
Parents often act toxic when they set our brothers and sisters as an example to us or compare them to the “son of a mom’s friend,” who is always better, more beautiful, and more successful. This makes it a habit to compete with everyone. However, it can also be acquired if you communicate with people who are constantly competing with each other.
But the fact is that life is not a competition but an attempt to prove to everyone how cool you are, and this can only lead to disappointment and pain. It’s essential to focus on what you’re doing, not how to impress everyone around you. You also need to develop a sense of self-worth, which does not depend on whether you are superior to others in some way.
7. Does pointing out weaknesses motivate change?
They say that offended people tend to offend. And this phrase is true when it comes to contracting toxic behavior. If it is customary in your family to point out each other’s shortcomings and to “shame with good intentions,” then you are most likely inclined to give unsolicited advice to others. This behavior is toxic and unacceptable.
It doesn’t just offend — often pointing out flaws lowers self-esteem and makes the other person feel lousy. If you want to maintain good relations with others, follow the rule: if something cannot be fixed within five minutes, keep silent and do not point it out. For example, you can quietly whisper to a friend that his cheek is dirty, but you should not say that his pimples look so-so and it’s time to treat them.