You’ve probably heard that you don’t need to ignore your emotions but live them and release them correctly. This makes it easier to endure difficulties and avoid burnout and depression. However, like many others, this rule must only be followed sometimes. There are several situations when it is better to ignore emotions to make the right choice or to act based on the mind rather than the heart.
4 situations where you should ignore your emotions
1. When feelings contradict your values
Imagine that you are going to a dinner party with your girlfriend. She chooses her outfit carefully and eventually comes up to you with the question, “Does this dress make me fat?” and you notice that it is. This is one of the most awkward moments in a relationship. Most likely, you will experience significant anxiety when deciding whether to stay honest or lie to avoid trouble. On the one hand, by answering “no,” you will not spoil the girl’s mood and prevent resentment.
But on the other hand, it’s better to stay honest in a relationship, even when it’s very uncomfortable. And so your unwillingness to conceal the truth pulls you towards the answer “yes.” So what do you choose: ignore honesty, one of the most important values, or go along with emotions, telling lies to your girlfriend? It is better to prefer values rather than feelings at such moments, even if it seems complicated.
There are two reasons why you should do this. First of all, you will get the result. The unpleasant truth can make a girl feel disappointed, but your honest thoughts, if you express them tactfully, will lead to changes — the girl will receive information for reflection that will help her make the best decision.
Secondly, telling the truth will make you feel better than lying. Of course, lying can also bring relief, but only in the short term — you will most likely feel guilty after a while. And if you get used to constantly lying to a girl, you will eventually destroy her trust, leading to resentment and conflict. Remember that your emotions are just one of the sources of information in the decision—making process, and they are not infallible.
2. When feelings lead to aggression
Anger can be a great motivator to make a difference. It helps to fight back against abusers and becomes an incentive to acquire beneficial habits or correct mistakes. But on the other hand, it can lead to unhealthy aggression: Visit. A F R I N I K . C O M . For the full article. insensitive communication with friends, resentment, depression, and self-criticism. Like all emotions, anger is helpful in some cases and harmful in others. It would be best to learn to ignore it when it develops into open aggression.
Instead, it is not the emotion that must be ignored but the urges that arise because of it and can lead to disastrous consequences. So, if you find that anger is starting to get the better of you and can cause unwise decisions, try to “put it off for later” to avoid impulsive actions. No one forbids figuring out its causes a little later — for example, when you are alone.
3. When they cause concern
Anxiety and other emotions always go hand in hand. For example, if you are feeling anxious about an upcoming important meeting, you can start thinking through possible scenarios of your failure in your head. Thinking about what could go wrong, you don’t even notice how the excitement turns into real anxiety. Even a little nervousness can be a trigger for a lot of anxiety if you allow it to inflate to incredible limits.
That’s why sometimes it’s important not to listen to the disturbing things that your mind tells you but to ignore them. Judge for yourself: those minutes and hours that you spent worrying and imagining how a vital meeting would fail, you could spend usefully, for example, rereading the text of your speech or taking a walk to calm your nerves. Thus, sometimes, it is better to ignore your feelings to distract yourself from them and not let the anxiety grow to such an extent as to ruin your life.
4. When they lead to excessive reflection and self-criticism
Excessive thinking leads not only to anxiety but also to sadness and guilt. They also cause a drop in self-esteem and loss of self-confidence. Imagine you’re lying in bed and can’t sleep for long. Suddenly, a memory pops into my head that you once cheated on an ex-girlfriend. Even though it was a long time ago, you still feel guilty. In response to this emotion, you begin to recall the small details of an unpleasant event, analyze and question them, and reproach yourself for your mistake.
Now, due to self-criticism, you feel sad and realize that you are unlikely to be able to sleep that night. Sadness, guilt, or shame are productive emotions because they help us learn from our mistakes. That’s true, but if they show up as scheduled, they only make you feel bad.
The best approach would be to acknowledge and confirm your emotions, then ignore them and switch your attention to something else: read a book or listen to a podcast until you feel the desire to sleep return. Exploring your feelings every time and immersing yourself in them is unnecessary, especially if they bring significant discomfort. It is better to set aside a certain amount of time for this than to suffer whenever the mistakes of the past pop up in your memories.
