How to get rid of platitudes in speech and become a good conversationalist

Indeed, you’ve felt out of place at least once when you’ve heard someone say banal things that sound rather pompous. A bad joke, an insincere compliment, a fact that everyone knows about — all this can make you not a very good conversationalist. To remain sincere, present, and attract rather than alienate people, it is essential to eliminate platitudes in speech. Here are some ways to do this.

7 Ways to get rid of Platitudes in speech and become a good conversationalist

1. Recognize situations when you speak memorized phrases or pretend

Sometimes, we try to impress others by creating an image that doesn’t belong to us. It makes us look corny, and it also makes us seem insincere. The first step to overcoming this is monitoring situations when you behave this way. Do you exaggerate stories to make them appear more interesting, or do you agree with someone to get approval? Do you think it’s better to hide your opinion and specific qualities to be accepted? Once you understand what you lack in sincerity, dig deeper to find the root cause. This may be self-doubt or excessive concern about what others might think.

We often resort to platitudes when we are under pressure or trying to achieve unrealistic standards of success and popularity. Solving these underlying problems will help you feel more comfortable being yourself. It’s essential to remain open in appropriate situations, allowing your personality, humor, or passion to show through. For example, you can tell a girl the phrase “I’m delighted with your curls; they look just wonderful” instead of the banal “You look good.”

Such compliments are much more pleasant, as they reflect your point of view and allow you to show vulnerability, which leads to trust. Also, feel free to share the details of your life and experiences rather than just superficial stories that show you in a better light. You can better express your true self with practice and the right mindset.

2. Reformulate

It is essential to avoid frequently used phrases and idioms to stop sounding corny. They are not very expressive; they may seem annoying or too superficial, which makes it challenging to communicate efficiently. Here is an example: you should not tell a friend going through a breakup that time heals — such advice does not help to feel better. To convey the same meaning, replace banal words with others: “I know it’s hard for you. Visit. A F R I N K , C O M. For the full article. It takes time to get through this difficult moment, and I’m ready to be by your side.” You must admit that the second option sounds more sympathetic, shows that you are ready to support a friend, and is also more personal than the steady expression that he has most likely heard more than once.

3. Make your speech minimalistic

We often say platitudes to make ourselves seem more intellectually savvy or interested in conversation. For example, we insert sayings into speech that are out of place or use stable expressions that appear dull. How would you react to such a monologue:” Of course, I understand that the grass is always greener on the other side. But you can still find joy in your own life every day. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, so you need to learn to notice the pleasant every day.” Admit it; it doesn’t sound clear or crumpled, even with so many words.

And this monologue is full of platitudes, so you probably got annoyed while reading it. How can we convey the same idea but in a more pleasant way? Try to make the speech minimalistic and understandable. The ability to communicate information accurately is a sign of high intelligence. This does not always require a lot of words, figurative meanings, and decorations for speech. Instead of a long text, you can say: “We may constantly feel that someone is living better, and this is frustrating. But if you try, you can learn to find joy in your imperfect life and be happier.” Note that the essence of the text is the same, but reading the second example was much more enjoyable.

4. Change platitudes for evidence

People use platitudes to back up their words. For example, they use the phrase “Those who don’t take risks don’t drink champagne” to encourage someone to take action. However, this is most often perceived as an attempt to influence behavior in any possible way. To be an interesting conversationalist who wins other people’s attention correctly, trade platitudes for facts and evidence. Give statistics, refer to research and life stories to support your point of view, and help convince people, forcing them to reflect, analyze your words, and decide.

5. Avoid the phrase “Everyone knows” and the like

Do you know which commonplace can be called one of the most common? It sounds like “Everyone knows” or “Surely you all know that…”. These phrases sound annoying and can also be perceived as arrogance or a sign that you have nothing to say. Don’t use them in a speech to be an interesting conversationalist. If you want to talk about something, note: “I want to share with you what I have learned,” you can also ask the question: “What do you know about it?” This approach will help develop the topic, gain people’s attention and show that you want not only to express your opinion but also to listen to others.

6. Express your appreciation in detail

Do you want to practice not making your speech banal but also improving your relationships with others? Express your gratitude in detail. Instead of the usual “Thank you” or “I appreciate you,” find words that will help emphasize your sincere feelings. You can use “Thank you for always listening to me” or “I appreciate your kindness so much.” Changing the habit of gratitude is a great way to train your brain to be banal. Over time, you will be able to express appreciation in a new way, make more meaningful compliments, and generally communicate on a deeper level.

7. Ask clarifying questions

Imagine a friend telling you about an event that has deeply affected him. The worst thing you can say at this point is a platitude like “Everything happens for a reason” or “Sometimes bad things lead to better things.” These are not words of encouragement but a way to hide that you don’t know what to say. Instead of these platitudes, it is better to ask clarifying questions. You can ask a friend how you could help him, how he copes with emotions, and what he thinks to do next. Sometimes, you must become a good listener to be a better conversationalist. This will help to avoid platitudes and build high-quality communication.