Even if for most of your adult life you’ve been very worried about minor setbacks, constantly berating yourself, and worrying about how you appear to other people, one day everything can change. But we don’t always notice these changes, no matter how desirable they may be. Below are several signs indicating that you have managed to carry out extensive work on yourself.
10 signs you’ve learned to be kinder to yourself when you make mistakes
1. Instead of self-criticism, you quickly move on to finding a solution
Previously, when you made a mistake, you immediately began to criticize yourself, to look within yourself for the reasons why this happened. Now, if you notice your mistake, you almost immediately recognize it and move on to the most important question: “What should I do about it?” You’re not self-flagellating, but you’re trying to figure out how to fix the situation. The ability to quickly deal with what happened and resolve the problem becomes a top priority for you.
2. It’s easier for you to tell other people about your mistake
If you’ve recently admitted to someone that you overestimated your strength, took on too much, overlooked an important detail, or noticed a mistake in your work, it means you’ve started to take your failures more easily. You no longer set yourself the goal of constantly maintaining the image of a person who always does everything right. Moreover, it becomes easier for you to talk not only about some harmless everyday details, but also about those of your decisions that were criticized by others and in the end really turned out to be wrong.
3. You can safely admit that you don’t know something
Often, the fear of making mistakes is closely related to the desire to look competent, regardless of the situation. Because of this, some people try to create an image of a confident professional even when they really don’t know something and need help. If you can calmly admit to others that you don’t understand a certain topic, this position makes you stronger. You don’t have to pretend to get imaginary respect, and then spend time and effort correcting the consequences of your decisions.
4. You’re not endlessly trying to find excuses for yourself
A person who finds it difficult to admit his mistakes tends to look for their causes externally. For example, to convince others that he did not have enough time, he was constantly distracted, he did not receive comprehensive information, and so on. Of course, sometimes such circumstances really play an important role in the final result. But more often they become another way to at least partially absolve themselves of responsibility. If you’ve become more comfortable with your own mistakes and failures, it means you no longer have to constantly resort to making excuses. You can honestly explain what went wrong while acknowledging your responsibility.
5. You stopped perceiving one mistake as a characteristic of your personality
It’s one thing to admit that you made a mistake; for example, you didn’t prepare well for an interview. And it’s quite another to automatically conclude that you are an irresponsible and completely incapable person who will never be able to get a good job. In the first case, you have a specific problem that you can fix; in the second, you turn your mistake into a characteristic of your personality. When you start to feel more comfortable about your own failures, the craving for such generalizations decreases along with the emotional intensity.
6. You realize that you might make a mistake again
A healthy attitude to mistakes is based on understanding: sometimes, after a failure, you can’t immediately draw the right conclusions and rebuild your patterns of behavior. Sometimes, even knowing what to do, you still choose to act in your usual way. Just because a new situation turns out to be more difficult than the previous one, you make decisions automatically or under pressure from circumstances. An easy attitude toward mistakes does not negate the need to change something about yourself or your perception. But it significantly reduces your anxiety about the future.
7. You don’t avoid actions just because you’re afraid of making a mistake
Some people rarely make mistakes, not because they do everything perfectly. The real reason for their luck is inaction. They don’t offer their ideas, they don’t try anything new, they don’t get to know people, they don’t rush to implement any solutions, and so on. If your attitude to mistakes changes, you rebuild your entire approach to action. Instead of procrastinating, waiting for everything to work itself out, you start trying. Because there will always be a risk of making a mistake, but with it you still have a chance for a positive outcome.
8. You apologize without feeling humiliated at the same time
If earlier apologies could be perceived by you as an admission that you are stupid, weak, or unworthy of respect, now you treat them much more simply. Visit. A F R I N I K . C O M . For the full article. You don’t try to defend yourself, you don’t apologize for too long, you don’t list all your flaws to the other person, as if trying to destroy your self-esteem. No, you’re specifically describing the problem and apologizing for it. Well, then you start discussing what you should do next.
9. After receiving criticism, you can separate information from emotions
Of course, when someone else points out a possible mistake to you, you’re not experiencing the most pleasant emotions one way or another. But if criticism used to unsettle you for a long time, now you treat it much more calmly. Before making any conclusions, you analyze the information you receive, namely its essence, without resorting to self-assessment. You highlight specifics, compare other people’s words with facts, and ask questions if something is unclear to you. You put your own emotions in the background so that they don’t interfere with your objectivity.
10. You don’t get hung up on the error
Well, last but not least, a sign of internal changes that have occurred is that you don’t devote all your free time to a mistake. There is no such thing as canceling meetings, losing your ability to work, returning to unpleasant thoughts all day, worrying about public opinion, and so on. Especially if you have already managed to solve the problem. You just admit that you made a mistake and move on without dwelling on it.
