Development crisis definition and solution
Life is a process in which our priorities, desires, and goals change. Research in sociology says that a transitional phase occurs after every 6-8 years of stability. Sometimes, it proceeds harmoniously, barely noticeable, but more often, it stretches for 2-3 years, making a person feel depressed due to uncertainty. For the first time, we encounter this phenomenon after graduation.
The usual life ends abruptly; then, the choice is a university, army, work, or self—search. Around 30, a new rethink is taking place. The career direction and the achievable ceiling are already clearly visible. It’s time to fully focus on the present instead of chasing impossible dreams. Then there is a midlife crisis and, finally, retirement.
Signs of a development crisis
Intermediate development crises may occur between natural stages, depending on a change of occupation, a break in relationships, or an unexpected reduction at work.
They feel like anxiety caused by the need for a breakthrough or global change. However, the symptoms of a developmental crisis appear a little earlier. You can better prepare for an unpleasant situation by recognizing them in advance.
Concern instead of comfort
Let’s examine this symptom using a work example. Once, it seemed promising, at least acceptable. Otherwise, you would have needed to get a job there. As the years passed, the work hardly changed, but it began to be perceived differently for some reason.
Boredom, obligation, or even something hateful. A once comfortable routine has become so uncomfortable that it is no longer tolerable. However, real change requires a decisive step in a completely unknown direction.
It scares you, so you keep putting up with it, calling the thirst for change a childish whim. You try to calm yourself with the thought that it was expected before, even if you liked it. What has changed now? Age, the cycle has passed, and your views have changed, but life has remained the same.
Irritability from small things
All people have flaws. You choose to notice and think about them, either ignore them or turn them into a positive, a reason for a joke. It sounds simple when you look at situations in isolation from the external environment.
In real life, additional factors influence us. For example, the supervisor at work suddenly became too meticulous. He’s always been like that, but now it’s especially annoying.
In this case, the problem is most likely in the work. You have a long-term relationship, but recently, your friend’s habits—maybe her words are parasites, or too frequent calls have begun to cause aggression—have begun to cause your relationship to end. A rupture or major repair is needed.
Dreams of escape
Golden sand, clear and warm sea, and several palm trees under which you lie in a hammock. You must get to your feet carefully so as not to crush one of the crabs that scurry along the beach. The undeterred parrots are watching the painting in a state of complete serenity.
There are rarely people on the island. Everyone dreams of something like this sometimes. Living in a large city, you appreciate privacy especially highly, so the dream of escape seems normal. However, it is worth treating it with great attention. Do you want to visit a specific place, or are you ready to run without looking back and abandon everything forever?
The feelings can understand the difference
The desire to visit somewhere does not cause special emotions—it’s just pictures that arouse interest. The dream of escape becomes a kind of shelter. Imagining how you disappear from everyday life gives you warmth, comfort, and calm.
Awareness of the speed of time
Sooner or later, anyone realizes how fleeting life is and how inexorable time is. Physically, nothing changes; the second-hand moves at the same speed, but unfulfilled desires and unachieved goals remain precisely the same. Each of them reminds of itself louder and louder. After all, one day, it will be too late.
Moreover, there needs to be more time for all desires and dreams. At the very least, you will have to choose and prioritize. It makes my head spin, and the worst decision is to wait a little longer; suddenly, a chance and the best moment will come.
How to overcome the crisis of development
We have considered only the most common signs of a development crisis. Suspecting that you are at this stage, you should conduct a more in-depth analysis. The fact is that entirely different stimuli can cause the same emotions.
Completely different stimuli can cause the same emotions. Only an honest conversation with yourself will help clarify the picture and take the most effective measures. Nevertheless, there are relatively universal ways to smooth out anxiety and restore a taste for life.
In the stress and real problems section
If you feel irritable at work or in a relationship, it’s worth taking a break, taking a step back, and looking at the situation from the outside. Perhaps the problem has changed in the last few weeks: the season has come, provoking a blockage at work, and the girl is going through a difficult life period that requires increased attention, which exhausts you.
Take control of your emotions and turn on rationality. Consider whether the current problems will go away naturally, what actions you require, and how circumstances should develop. If the picture is fantastic, then life needs to change. However, the difficulties may be temporary and quite easily overcome.
Tell us about your feelings
When no more strength exists, you can endure until the lid is torn off the boiler. Or take a bold step, not caring what they think of you. Talk to the management about excessive meticulousness or excessive demands. You may be advised to resign—that’s what you’ll do.
After all, you will know firsthand that this is the only way out. However, another scenario is also likely, especially if you are in good standing: they will give you a vacation, change the policy a little, and you will return to a normal job.
Don’t act impulsively
Any significant changes should be approached with a clear head. You need to weigh all the available introductory information and decide precisely how you will act. Not only tomorrow or in a week but at least for several months.
Refrain from succumbing to the deceptive images that your imagination draws when imagining a future life. Stay realistic. You should not rent a separate apartment after a drunken quarrel with a friend. Don’t take any other job, so you don’t have to see the boring office anymore. Only buy the most expensive travel equipment, as you will likely go on a multi-year hike all over the planet later.
Summarize
The development crisis is the best period for summarizing interim results. Life will continue, but the next stage will pass and must be evaluated. Imagination can easily create an ideal picture where goals are achieved and dreams are realized.
It will be strikingly different from the existing reality, which causes depression. However, it is just as possible to imagine the worst-case scenarios. Dig into your memory, and you’ll probably find forks where you could quickly have taken a wrong turn.
The point of this comparison is to look at your life objectively. She’s hardly that bad—she could have been better, but worse, too. There is no time to rewind, but there are still several stages ahead — go through them more masterfully.
Act or improve
This is the surest way to overcome the development crisis. Evaluate your capabilities, knowledge, and skills and compare them with the desired result. Do you live up to your ambitions? If so, experiment, make mistakes, but act.
However, the answer is likely to be negative. Life is far from ideal just because of the lack of certain qualities. So it’s time to retrain. It doesn’t matter what it’s about, whether it’s a new job, a change of citizenship, or building a healthier relationship. Remember that the development crisis does not kill but may well break a person forever. Then, life turns into an existence on autopilot.