How to stop feeling guilty about everything that’s going wrong in your life

When something goes wrong, you can take full responsibility for it without even thinking about the real situation. You often think that if you took a few steps back, you could have acted differently and come to a different result. But this is not always true. There are too many factors influencing every step you take. In order not to suffer from feelings of guilt, you need to adjust your attitude to what is happening to you and around you.

9 ways to avoid feeling guilty about life’s problems

1. Take into account the force of circumstances

Your decisions and their consequences are influenced by countless factors, many of which you will never know about. Someone else’s mood, the weather, transport schedules, illnesses, natural disasters, and the state of technology can all dramatically change the trajectory of your life, regardless of your intentions and efforts.

It is important to remember that you do not live in a vacuum; you are part of an extensive system in which events take place that do not depend on you. Recognizing that your life is being affected by circumstances beyond your control is the first step towards freeing yourself from guilt. Analyze the situation objectively, evaluate external factors, and don’t take responsibility for something you can’t control.

2. Remember that other people influence your life

Your life is closely intertwined with the lives of other people. Their decisions, words, and actions have a direct impact on you. Sometimes it’s positive, and sometimes it’s negative. You can even take the blame for the consequences of someone else’s actions, believing that you could have prevented them or that you somehow provoked the person.

But this is not always the case. Everyone is responsible for their choices and actions. You should not take the blame for other people’s mistakes or shortcomings. Visit, A F R I N I K . C O M . For the full article. Instead, shift the focus to what you can control—your reactions and actions in response to other people’s actions.

3. Learn to forgive yourself for mistakes

Making mistakes is normal. We are all imperfect, and no single person has always done everything correctly. Instead of beating yourself up for past mistakes, try to learn from them. Ask yourself the question: how can I fix the situation now? You can often take some actions that will reduce your anxiety and stress levels.

Even if you can’t do anything, there’s no reason to keep beating yourself up. You deserve to be forgiven. Another critical point is that forgiving yourself does not mean justifying mistakes. It’s a recognition that you have much to grow and something to consider.

4. Distinguish between responsibility and guilt

Responsibility is the willingness to admit one’s involvement in what happened and take steps to remedy the situation. Guilt is a feeling of shame that paralyzes and prevents you from moving forward. It is important to understand the difference between these two concepts. Acknowledge your responsibility if you think you could have done something and thus avoided problems.

Directing your resources to fix the situation will be much more effective than spending them on guilt and self-deprecation. Focus on solving the problem, not on self-flagellation, and you will be surprised how much your attitude towards failures and failures will change.

5. Get rid of irrational beliefs

Guilt is often associated with irrational beliefs. For example, you may think that you must be perfect, please others, and take responsibility for everything in your and others’ lives. Such beliefs are unrealistic: you cannot meet your expectations and achieve the desired result. Moreover, your aspirations will eventually lead to feelings of disappointment and guilt.

Try to change these beliefs to more rational ones, allowing you to move forward without unnecessary pressure and tension. For example, instead of striving to achieve an ideal, focus on self-development and take small daily steps toward your goals.

6. Practice self-compassion

You’re just a human being, and people make mistakes. We cannot predict everything that our words and actions can lead to. That’s why it’s so important to practice self—compassion—the ability to treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially in difficult moments. Imagine that your close friend found himself in a similar situation. You would unlikely have said hurtful words to him or left him without your support.

Think about how you would treat him and what you would like him to remember at such a moment. You would probably be sympathetic and try to comfort, cheer him up, and help him in any way you can. Treat yourself the same way — you have to come first for yourself. Don’t be too hard on yourself; remember, you deserve sympathy and understanding.

7. Let go of control

We often feel guilty when something doesn’t go according to plan because we must control everything. But we must admit that it is full of surprises, so we cannot anticipate and direct all possible paths in the right direction. Learn to let go of control — accept that not everything depends on you, and focus on what you can control. For example, you can choose how to react to a particular situation and what to do with it. You can truly control your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Admit this fact; then, it will be easier to eliminate the guilt.

8. Focus on the present and the future

You can’t change the past, no matter how hard you try. So, instead of constantly revisiting your mistakes, wondering if you could have done otherwise, and worrying about what others think of you, focus on the present moment. Here and now, you have the opportunity to do something to improve the situation or avoid its recurrence in the future.

Bring yourself back to thoughts that you can turn into reality. Otherwise, all your energy will be drained into meaningless reflections on the past tense and introspection. Focus on the present and the future; then, you can move forward and build a happy life based on unpleasant experiences.

9. Ask for help from a specialist

If the feeling of guilt persists, you realize that you cannot cope with it on your own, and it begins to prevent you from leading a full life, which means that the situation requires the intervention of a professional. Seek help from a psychologist or psychotherapist. A specialist will help you understand the causes of guilt, change your irrational beliefs, and teach you how to deal with difficulties healthily.