Ways to politely remind a friend of a debt and get payback

Waiting for a refund from the friend you lent it to can be tedious, especially if the person constantly makes excuses and reschedules the return date of funds. At such moments, you think about how to stop being kind and helping others.

In addition, it is not always easy to ask for a refund — many of us feel considerable awkwardness at such moments. Of course, such conversations are unpleasant, but it is important to learn how to conduct them if you do not want to be left without money. Here’s how to remind a friend that it’s time to return the funds.

8 ways to politely remind a friend of a debt and get payback

1. Avoid confrontation

It is unlikely that your friend will be pleased if you run into him and rudely remark that he is still in your debt. Besides, it would be best if you didn’t get involved in a confrontation to get your money back. Often, significant quarrels become a reason to break up a relationship, because of which you will lose both funds and a friend.

Avoid passive-aggressive remarks about a friend — they create tension and always border on rudeness. Raise the issue of debt repayment when you feel calm and confident that you can keep your emotions under control. If the situation suddenly becomes so tense that it can escalate into a conflict, always try to defuse it or suspend the conversation to calm down.

2. Remind debt in a friendly way

Sometimes, people forget that they owe someone money when they try to cope with many life problems. Of course, this does not mean you need to give them funds, but you should also talk to them in a friendly way, especially if you remind them of the need to return the money for the first time.

You can ask a friend if he remembers what he borrowed from you and when he can repay it. Send him a text message: “Hello! When can you repay the money I lent you last month?” Also, remember that conversations about money and other sensitive topics should always occur in person.

Do not create an awkward situation by reminding a friend of your duty when you are in a circle of friends, colleagues, or strangers. This is unpleasant and can cause a big quarrel.

3. Point out your financial situation

You can point out your financial situation to convince a friend to repay a debt. As a rule, people who value and respect us will consider such information and try to reimburse the borrowed funds as soon as possible. Explain that you would be very grateful if a friend would return the money as soon as possible since you must pay the bills. V I S I T A F R I N I K. C O M . Or let him know that your loan to him was time-limited and was a temporary measure, not a gift.

You can also mention any financial problem to let your friend know that his obligations have not been canceled and they hurt your well-being. And if you don’t have any difficulties, you can come up with something insignificant to put a little pressure on a friend.

4. Speak directly

Straightforwardness is a great solution if your friend doesn’t understand the hints that it’s time to repay the debt. Tell him openly and clearly that you need your funds, and indicate the deadline by which he must return them. Speak calmly, and do not succumb to his persuasions and attempts to get you emotional.

5. Give up certain activities

If you want to hint that you want to get your money back, refuse a friend’s offers that involve spending money. For example, if he invites you to have lunch at a cafe, answer: “I would love to, but I don’t have enough money right now to visit places.” If your friend is far from stupid and understands social signals, he may offer to repay your debt or pay for you by paying off part of his loan.

6. Suggest payment plan options

Perhaps a friend borrowed a large sum from you and cannot give it back in full. In this case, offer him a flexible payment plan so that he can gradually pay off his debt. For example, he can reimburse the borrowed funds within a few months.

If you suspect that he may not fulfill his obligation, put your agreement on paper. Of course, it’s unpleasant to do this to a friend, but it’s still better to protect yourself if he’s not a very responsible person.

7. Ask to work for the money

Maybe your friend got into a big financial mess and can’t give you the money back. But at the same time, you don’t want to give him money just like that if your friend is an expert in some field and can do you a favor, ask him to do it.

For example, he is engaged in interior decoration. Ask: “Tell me, how much does it cost on average to paste wallpaper in two rooms? If you help me with the repairs, I will deduct this amount from your debt.” This approach will help to maintain a friendship with a person and relieve him of guilt because he wants to but cannot reimburse you. At the same time, it will benefit your interior.

8. Corner him

Yes, you can feel like a collector when trying to get your money from someone who does not want to return it. And sometimes, you have to do the wrong thing to get the funds back. You can hint to a friend that if he doesn’t pay you back within a week, his wife will find out about his financial problem. Or find another pressure point, at which point he will give up and fulfill your request.

It is worth doing this only if a friend ignores your requests for debt repayment or repeatedly promises to reimburse the funds but does not keep his word. Using this method can lead to a breakup with your boyfriend, which is also worth remembering. The probability that you won’t get your money with this approach increases, but it’s still worth a try if you realize your friend didn’t return it anyway.