Friend zone is an annoying concept, however, this is not surprising: it is unpleasant when the person you are in love with regards you only as a friend. But it is worth noting that in most cases, this is your fault. If you have found yourself in the friend zone with a girl more than once, it’s time for you to think about what you are doing wrong.
However, if you are among those asking this question: Why do I always get friendzoned? Below are the reasons you are always friendzone.
You are afraid to show your feelings
The first thing you should do if you feel that you have fallen into the friend zone is to ask yourself if the girl knows that you like her. If you are afraid to show your feelings and try to compensate for this by showing attention to her or making ambiguous statements, it is not surprising that the girl does not regard you as a potential boyfriend.
The people around you are not psychics, until you tell them yourself, they will not be able to understand exactly how you feel about them. Do not be afraid to show your feelings, in the worst case, you will be rejected, but it’s still better than suffering from the unknown.
You don’t show your specific intentions
It may be that you show the girl your interest, pay attention to her, try to take care of her, but your intentions still remain not completely clear. It is foolish to hope for a relationship if you act like a good friend to her or show yourself as a person who is trying to be a gentleman. If you want to let her know that you like her as a girl – give her flowers, invite her on a date, tell her about your feelings.
You don’t know how to be persistent
If a girl refuses to meet you, and you put up with it without even trying to talk to her and find out what the reason for the refusal is, then you deserve to live in the friend zone. A person may refuse to meet with you in many cases because of the huge amount of work, busy schedule, fatigue, bad mood, etc. Respect the girl’s answer, but still be persistent: find out from her why she refused. Perhaps the second attempt to invite her on a date will be successful.
You complain all the time
Your life is constant problems, you always complain about low salary, bad attitude from others, poor health, etc. Of course, complaints are not bad, but everything should be in moderation. If your every meeting with the girl you like ends with your monologue about your plight, then most likely you are doomed to spend your life alone or continue to believe that sooner or later you will come across a girl with the rescuer syndrome.
You often talk about your exes
Not every girl regards your conversations about the former as ordinary memories of the past. And be honest, it would also be unpleasant for you to constantly hear from a girl that arouses your interest something about the guys she once dated. People often talk about things they are obsessed with or that hurt them a lot. The girl you’re in love with can be sure that you still have feelings for your ex. And, of course, she will not even think about how to start a relationship with you.
You are too good a friend
Perhaps the girl is so calm, fun, and comfortable with you that she does not want to change anything in your relationship. If you initially acted solely as a good friend, without showing that you like her, then changing what is between you can be difficult. The girl will worry about whether it is worth transferring friendship into a relationship, because if you break up, the connection will be lost forever. Moreover, few people have believed in the “we can remain friends” argument lately.
You allow disrespectful jokes
If you condescendingly joke about the connection between a girl’s hair color and her intellect, make sexist remarks, devalue her dreams and aspirations, then nothing will shine for you. It is unpleasant for any person when disrespectful jokes are allowed in his direction. If you say something funny and it’s funny to everyone but the girl, then you screwed up. And gaining her trust will be extremely difficult.
You don’t recognize flirting
Maybe the girl reciprocates and wants to communicate with you further, gradually reducing the distance, but you just don’t notice it. Sometimes you can ignore flirting on her part, either by ignoring it or justifying it with common courtesy. Notice the details in the behavior of the girl, listen to what and how she says. You can learn a lot of new and interesting things for yourself if you just be more attentive to others.
You don’t make the girl your priority
What is more important to you – the girl you want to achieve, or another meeting with friends, another skating rink in a video game, a day off completely spent on idleness? When you are in love, you should prioritize the person – try to see her as often as possible, pay attention to her, and do something nice. It’s no wonder you’re in the friend zone if you only remember your feelings in between having fun and solving pressing problems.
You chat with several girls at once
If the one you like sees that you are simultaneously communicating with her and other girls, trust in you, your feelings and motives for behavior disappear. The girl simply cannot believe in what interests you in the first place as a person. In general, if you want a relationship, be selective – a girl should not feel competitive and, even more so, should not feel ordinary. Show her that she really deserves a special approach, attention, care.
You are used to rushing things
Maybe what you think is the friend zone is actually the beginning of a relationship, and you’re in too much of a hurry. If you are afraid to be in the role of a friend, you can push the girl or yourself, wait for a conversation about reciprocal feelings or intimacy after a couple of weeks after meeting. But this is wrong – each person needs a certain amount of time in order to understand himself, get to know the other person better, prepare for a conversation about relationships, etc.