You used to live in peace and quiet with your girlfriend, but you often notice weird attitudes in her. Damn! The balloon is about to burst.
Your friends are trying to open your eyes, this girl is using you. But you are swimming in the ocean of love that will soon swallow and left you with deep regrets. Some signs do not lie: for them, you are in the clutches of a profiteer, but you do not see it. Love is blind, indeed.
When you live in it, you don’t realize it, you are not objective. Love makes you blind, and the profiteer, the manipulator, knows how to go about committing her crimes with impunity.
These three attitudes that prove this girl uses you but doesn’t like you.
1. A question of intellectual capital
I could remember my university days. Some guys will do some strange things to please their girl to win their hearts or to be called the pleasant or correct guy. Especially the one where their girlfriends forced them to do their homework in order to hope to go out with her.
Rank 1 manipulators: Make no mistake: there is the rank 1 manipulator, the one who makes you dangle a relationship with her, and who uses you to lay her reports, her presentations, her essays. She has understood everything and is not in love with you.
Rank 2 manipulators: And the rank 2 manipulators are the worst. The one you are in a relationship with and who exploits you. Who will milk you until you are dry. That will suck all of your mental resources out of you. And left you dry in the middle of brokenness with sympathy.
You shouldn’t let that go, of course. Always ask yourself the question, “What did she do to deserve it? Does she really care about me? Would she be there for me if I needed her for the same?”
If you realize that the answer is NO, it’s because she is using you… You are a kind of springboard for her future, she is using you to go faster. Which is very smart of her. Don’t you know that my favorite color is yellow, and blue will match that my cloth, and so would red color do… get three pairs and I will be happier: this girl is a genius.
Likewise, in the “world of work”, the newly employed who advances faster thanks to their mentor (and also the boss) does not necessarily sleep with him… she only dangles a possible relationship with him, without going through the promotion box. So far…
2. A question of social capital
The second type of manipulator resents your network, the people you know. You are not necessarily rich, handsome, intelligent, but you hang out with beautiful people? Watch out for the profiteer you are going to attract.
She will always ask you more questions about “them”, the powerful, wealthy or influential people you hang out with, and less and less about you. She will always want to accompany you. You are her ticket to a world where she is not invited!
She will start to memorize the songs of your rocker or rapper buddies. Sometimes she will see them behind your back.
Of course, friendly love, at first sight, does exist. But this upstart will have no qualms and throw you real quick when a guy in the upper-division accepts her on his arm. To tell the truth, it won’t be a big loss for you the day she leaves you…
3. A question of economic capital
This one, it is formidable at the Fastfood, cinema, restaurant. It starts like that, and it’s still acceptable, it smacks of chivalry, romanticism, even gallantry! It seems that when you want dessert, you have to pay the bill…
But afterward, things can get out of hand very quickly… She has money problems, she taxes you to pay for her cigarettes. She always wants to go shopping with you and often forgets her credit card. She never invites you to a restaurant. Only gives you gifts that his big brother didn’t want.
And one day, she finds herself asking you to pay her rent because she can’t afford it, because she’s having a hard time. Urgent 2k! Of course, she offers to reimburse you very quickly, “my love”. This is the beginning of the end for you.
The broke girl is a fighter with a strong survival potential. She will do everything in her power to ensure a future that is better than her past. Also called a cashier, she will come to scratch glasses in the evening. Will leave magazines with articles circled in red marker. Will tell you about all the wonderful gifts her girlfriend’s guys give them.
Do not be jealous in the evening if she goes begging elsewhere. For her, dressing up with guys richer than you is just the next step. The day she can handle her lifestyle on her own, you will probably disappear. Keep an eye out… She is using you to swim through the tide.
Be careful, don’t make me say what I didn’t say: not all girls are venal.
How does she achieve her ends?
She starts to cry when she doesn’t win—her goal: to make you feel guilty. Playing the guilt card is a characteristic that is often found in narcissistic perverts.
Yes, gentlemen, this girl loves herself very much and doesn’t like you. If she likes you, at best… She still tolerates you, sometimes…
You will find that she will never dare to approach a discussion head-on with you. Her standard sentences if you do not give in to her whims, her desires, if you reproach her, if you try to have a discussion about her behavior will be filled with attempts at guilt:
- “You do not love me anymore.”
- “You’ve changed since I’ve known you.”
- “You don’t pay me any more attention.”
- “You think my life, my studies, my career are less important than yours.”
- You become the insensitive big bad who sees evil everywhere, who denigrates her, a fragile little thing.
Don’t let yourself be fooled. Does she seem interested in you? To be there for you? Or is she only thinking about her worries and her desires? If you are in the second case, you can part with her, even if it hurts…
It will seem either too down to earth or too cynical to you, but we only live once. It would be a shame to be fooled by a girl who uses you.
So ask yourself these questions frankly: What does she really do for you? Is she interested in you or only in the benefits you get for her? Does she stay with you during the hard times?
What about you? Have you ever dealt with a girl using you? Tell us how it went in the comment section!