Ways your friend is distancing your relationship without saying it
Not everyone can say, “Listen, I don’t want to be friends with you.” Instead, many people prefer to distance themselves, letting the problem take its course and hoping it will resolve itself.
It is worth noting that we are not always to blame for someone wanting to negate communication with us. There may be dozens of reasons why a person wants to do this.
Learning how to decipher the signals that a friend is trying to distance himself from you is essential. This will help you avoid wasting time on a person who does not seek to spend it with you, clearly understand what is happening, and eliminate unnecessary mental pain.
7 Ways Your Friend Distancing Your Relationship Without Saying It
1. Introducing himself to a new group
Perhaps you and your friend have always been part of the company you had fun with. But suddenly, he starts paying attention to completely different people. He always talks about how cool his new friends are, what they did together, and his feelings about these events. But at the same time, he is in no hurry to invite you to spend time with them. At such moments, you feel he gradually excludes you and other “old” comrades from his life.
It’s a very frustrating experience. Of course, it’s natural for people to make new connections and expand their social circle. But if your friend starts giving priority to someone else to the detriment of your friendship, then this is a sign that his intention to distance himself is more severe than ever. It may not be about you at all.
People are developing, and their social needs can change. You will have to accept that you and your friend will no longer be as close as before and try to switch to other people with whom the relationship is better.
2. It becomes more difficult to contact him
Perhaps in the past, your friend always answered messages and calls quickly, except when he was swamped. But if there is suddenly no place for you in his schedule and it lasts for a long time, then it’s worth considering.
This behavior may indicate that he is trying to create distance between you. This is a conscious or accidental psychological maneuver aimed at moving away from you. Normally, you’re upset about this, but let’s warn you that it’s important not to jump to conclusions.
It’s better to wait and see what happens next. Perhaps a friend wanted to distance himself from you for a while to cope with his problems and worries alone. But if this behavior lasts long, it’s time to talk to a friend about it.
3. He behaves too enthusiastically
Often, trying to mask genuine emotions, people begin to express opposite feelings actively. When a friend moves away, he may seem more optimistic or enthusiastic than usual. It’s like he’s trying to compensate for the distance he’s creating. You shouldn’t blame him for doing that.
Often, the reason for this behavior is the fear of hurting the feelings of someone you are moving away from or the desire to avoid confrontation. Therefore, a friend can try to look cheerful and friendly whenever he is next to you. But still, you can see his enthusiasm and positivity are strained and insincere.
Interaction with him becomes superficial, devoid of the depth that your friendship once had. Of course, not every cheerful friend deep down wants to negate communication with you. But if a friend’s excessive enthusiasm seems out of line with his usual behavior, it may be a sign that he is trying to create a specific space between you.
4. He discloses less personal information
When we are in a close relationship with someone, we want to share the details of our daily lives, thoughts, and feelings. But if we’re going to distance ourselves, then this desire fades. We begin hiding the details of our personal lives and discussing abstract topics.
If your friend suddenly stops talking about his job, girlfriend, family, and other essential things, he may want to keep his distance from you. Of course, each of us has periods when we become more withdrawn and restrained, for example, if there is a “black streak” in life. But when a friend suddenly stops sharing personal things with you and goes on for a long time, it’s worth making a certain conclusion.
5. His interest in your life is low
Friendship is a two—way road. We are as interested in our friends’ lives as they are in ours. But sometimes, people lose interest in our lives. They limit themselves to vague comments and nods in conversation and never ask questions.
This behavior can be temporary when a person is going through a bad moment and finds it difficult to focus on something other than his problems. But it can also become “chronic”—in this case, we can say that your friend is trying his best to distance himself, but he cannot admit it.
6. He reacts differently to your success
Friendship is the ability to celebrate each other’s successes and support each other in difficult times. But suppose your friend starts reacting to your achievements differently than before.
Perhaps he shows some disdain when sharing good news, quickly changes the subject, or compares your success with other people’s accomplishments. It’s unpleasant to think that a friend is just not happy for you. But this is likely true, as well as the fact that he is trying to distance himself.
7. You are not a part of his plans
Imagine a situation: you offer a friend to spend the weekend together, but he shies away. Then you mention a new restaurant you’d like to go to together, and he abruptly changes the subject. When such behavior is repeated with enviable frequency, it can be concluded that a friend is trying to distance himself from you.
As a rule, people who want to communicate with us are open to including us in plans. Even if they can’t accurately name a specific date, they won’t translate the topic or promise out of the blue, but they will never keep their word. If rejecting or avoiding plans has become your friend’s standard reaction to all offers, then it’s worth considering what kind of wall he’s building between you.