Being attracted to someone other than your partner also happens in the best families. Experts say it is normal. But you should pay attention to a few basic things in order not to cross to the opposite bank.
And suddenly, you catch yourself being attracted like a magnet by some other or some other woman besides your partner. You’re not the only one. It happens in the best families, even in the most stable and happy relationships. It is, after all, one of the “thorns” of monogamy.
According to a survey, up to 50% of respondents in a relationship had ever felt something for someone other than their partner, while one in five had admitted that they were really in love with him, the human.
So since there is scientific evidence that this is something ordinary, which means that you are not the elephant in the room, the question arises: how will you manage this situation? The answer, or rather the answers, depend on many factors, as suggested by various relationship counselors, and do not lead well to separation .
Recognize the gaps in your relationship
First of all, try to think about why you are attracted to someone else. Does she offer you something that your partner does not offer you? If this is the case, psychologist Madeleine Mason Roantree suggests taking some time to reflect on what is missing from your current relationship and lead to other hugs.
Then she advises you to discuss your needs with her without necessarily admitting your attraction to another person if you do not want it. It is difficult for you because you are afraid of being divorced, which you do not wish to.
Do not panic
If you are a monogamous and faithful person by nature, this whole situation will create feelings of guilt, confusion, and anxiety. Do not be afraid, and do not panic. Relationship counselor James Preece suggests calm: “Before taking any drastic action, take a step back. It is perfectly normal to be attracted to other people, even when you are in a happy relationship.
In other words, you can be in a relationship with someone and still appreciate a beautiful woman when you see her. “A little imagination here and there is healthy, as long as it is limited to casual thinking and does not become action.”
Set boundaries
“As mentioned above, imagination is not infidelity. So staying in theory and not putting it into practice is a normal thing that happens to almost everyone. It’s something harmless about your relationship and you do not need to interpret that something is wrong with your partner. But if you go overboard, then yes, something is very wrong, “explains clinical psychologist Marc Hekster.
Determine the frequency of attraction
“Is this the first time something like this has happened to you? Or have you developed a pattern of behavior? ““Only you know the answer,” says Mason-Roantree.
Above all, be honest
“Attracting another woman from your relationship is another thing than cheating on her with the object of your secret desire. So if you no longer emit the same wavelength with her, then it is good, to be honest first with yourself and then with her and your paths part “, Mason-Roantree underlines.
