Why good moments feel suspicious, and How to trust them again
Sometimes, instead of enjoying a joyful event, you can look for a catch in everything. The expectation that something bad is about to happen to you prevents you from enjoying your successes, accepting gifts, accepting praise, and building strong relationships. Fortunately, this destructive behavior pattern can be eliminated. Of course, the process will not be quick, but the result is definitely worth the effort. This article is your step—by-step plan, with which you will gradually change your mindset and learn how to live the happy moments of life without unnecessary anxiety and stress.
10 reasons good moments feel suspicious—and How to trust them again
1. Analyze your fears
Your first step is to recognize and analyze the fears that underlie your behavior. Think about why you’re used to looking for a catch in everything, what exactly you are afraid of, and what the worst thing can happen if your worries turn out to be unfounded. Honest answers to these questions may indicate deeper problems: fear of failure, unwillingness to show vulnerability, and so on.
2. Work on self-assessment
Distrust of all the good things that happen to you can be a consequence of low self-esteem. If you don’t believe in your own importance, it will be difficult for you to admit that some positive event is happening in your life. Work on building self-confidence: acknowledge your achievements, celebrate your strengths, take care of yourself, and try to do things that bring you joy. The higher your self-esteem, the easier it will be for you to believe that you deserve the best.
3. Look for refutations, not confirmation of your negative thoughts
You can find convincing evidence for any of your beliefs — that’s how our brains work. Therefore, when you once again have the idea that an event seems too good to be true, change the rules of the game. Instead of looking for arguments in favor, try to challenge this assumption. Visit. A F R I N I K . C O M . For the full article. Remember similar situations from your life experience, find rational explanations for your current success, and think about the possible motives of others.
4. Set realistic expectations
You may be looking for a catch due to the fact that you initially raised the bar of your expectations. You imagine an ideal picture of the development of events, and any deviation from it, even the most insignificant, is perceived as a signal of an unsatisfactory result. Remember that life doesn’t always go according to the plan you’ve come up with in your head. Try to set realistic expectations: be prepared for the unexpected, for people to act in their own way, and to adapt your desires and needs.
5. Surround yourself with positive people
The kind of people you surround yourself with has a huge impact on your thinking. If there are toxic people among your loved ones who constantly complain about something, criticize and devalue everything and everyone, naturally, it’s hard for you to maintain a positive attitude. Try to spend more time with people who believe in you, with whom you enjoy communicating. This way, you can strengthen your self-esteem and learn to see the good around you.
6. Give up excessive control
Striving to control all aspects of your life will only lead to one thing: you will be in a state of chronic stress and worry about everything. By trying to anticipate every potential mistake or develop a plan for all cases, you deprive yourself of the opportunity to enjoy the present moment.
Learn to let go of control, especially where you definitely won’t suffer from this decision.
7. Accept uncertainty
Life is often unpredictable, and that’s a fact. Your attempts to avoid uncertainty will only lead to constant anxiety — you will live in anticipation of disaster. So try to accept the fact that it is impossible to know for sure what will happen in the future. Focus on what you’re sure of, and just watch the rest — don’t rush yourself to conclusions. This solution will allow you to relax and just start enjoying the good events.
8. Give yourself the right to make mistakes
The fear of making a mistake can push you into various doubts and suspicions. You are afraid that your actions will lead to negative consequences, so you constantly expect the worst. Try to remind yourself more often that mistakes are inevitable. No matter how hard you try, someday you will face failure. But with the right approach, you can learn from each of your mistakes valuable experience that will help you become stronger and wiser.
9. Sort out the details of a good event
It is useful to break down a good event into details: to analyze the reasons why it happened, to analyze which of your actions contributed to the positive development of events, and to make plans for the near future. This approach will help you consolidate positive experiences and believe that not everything in life has a catch.
10. Analyze the secondary benefits of your pessimism
You can get certain benefits from your pessimism. For example, expecting the worst, you may feel more prepared for possible difficulties, and by devaluing upcoming positive events, you can protect yourself from disappointment if something does go wrong. It is important to identify these secondary benefits and work through them, that is, to find healthier ways to meet your needs. Alternatively, instead of setting yourself up for the worst, you can make a backup plan and so on.
