You have to learn to be more persuasive. It has nothing to do with manipulation or imposing your ideas, but learning to use the correct tools to be convincing and get what you want, be it a raise, a vacation or your father-in-law changed his mind about you.
Being persuasive can help you, especially at work ( or in a job interview ), since you can use that to negotiate wages, hours, vacation days, and all kinds of benefits, since they do not ignore you (or give you a NO) every time you want to order something or propose an idea.
It is a very useful and necessary “skill,” and the best part is that it can be learned over time and with the correct (psychological) keys. Also, studies say that people have a hard time saying “no” and prefer to be cooperative with others, so it really won’t cost you too much to learn how to use this “superpower.”
To be more persuasive: 3 tricks of psychology
Remember that persuasion is an art, you do not want others to feel that you are playing with their minds or their emotions, but you want them to accept what you are saying, understand your point, and accept that for themselves.
Don’t worry about saying things perfectly
A University of Texas study says that people don’t listen to everything you say. They don’t remember every word or detail, so you don’t have to say everything perfectly, fill out your explanation, or request more information.
According to a Cornell University study, there is a thing called “fuzzy-trace theory,” which refers to the brain only remembering some details of the information it receives. It is the essence of the information that remains the most.
Knowing this is important because it means that you should not give a great speech, but rather that you should focus on making the right impression and creating a connection, something that allows him to “hook” and grasp the substance of what you are going to ask for.
You must do it in person
Maybe you think you can express yourself better by email or text message (it is also less humiliating to be rejected by these means). Still, written messages are easier to reject (because the other person does not have to do it in front of you).
So if you are going to ask or propose something, it is always best to do it in person, where you can use non-verbal language and other tricks to be persuasive.
Increase the level of confidence
“Pretend until you do.” One study found that people tend to lower their confidence level when they have to ask or propose something, which can cause mistakes to be made, instinct not listened to, or changes made to conform to the opinion of others.
A person who does not trust himself does not inspire confidence either, gives the impression that he is not sure what he is doing or wants to achieve, and his message is less convincing. So it’s important to act like you know everything is going to work out, learn to make your point, and stand your ground when you know something can work. Do not expect the worst.