How to master the practice of stepping back: 6 Key insights

What could be worse than giving up, admitting defeat? A lot of things. For example, not to give up, not to accept an obvious defeat, even when it happens. It’s easy to deny reality (at least for a while). The hope of a miracle will convince you that you need to review the results, find something good in the bad, and vice versa. You lost because the plan was bad, but the loss itself is not so bad, because it will lead to a new plan. It sounds absurd, but we readily believe it.

6 ways to master the practice of stepping back

1. Finding a good solution

Once on the verge of failure, a person concentrates on finding the ultimate solution that will turn the situation around. At the same time, we forget that we found ourselves in this position after a series of good decisions. At least, that’s what they seemed like before. A false conclusion is immediately drawn: he must have miscalculated, but where? It is worthwhile to learn from and avoid previous mistakes to prevent them from happening again.

A coherent logical formula does not take into account one thing. A good decision does not necessarily lead to a positive outcome. Visit. A F R I N I K . C O. M ,For the full article. That is, you might not have made obvious mistakes; you were just unlucky, and circumstances were against you.

Nevertheless, if you look for flaws, you will find many problems even where there have never been any. In hindsight, we’re all geniuses. Based on distorted data, you will make another, perhaps excellent decision, but it will not correspond to reality. A wave of self-criticism and painful analysis will follow a predictable failure. In this endless cycle, every good decision only worsens the situation and ultimately leads to negative consequences.

2. The desire to fight back

The more effort, time, money, or other resources are spent, the more difficult it is to abandon the original idea. Gambling is built on this human vulnerability. People come to the casino to win, but they lose with a probability close to 100%. Of course, if we are talking about long sessions.

If you get burned, you can’t climb anymore. Isn’t that right? But any casino has a lot of guests who also always (or almost always) lose. What pulls these people to the tables? The desire to fight back, the thought that today would be different, and finally, luck. Most of us are optimistic by nature; we want to believe in the best, even when everything says otherwise.

This installation is enhanced in proportion to the costs incurred. When a lot is already at stake, retreating means losing resources without a fight. It’s hard to do that, so the logical, if you will, peasant choice would be to continue the battle. More often than not, this led to even greater losses.

3. The main goal

That’s exactly what we’re not ready to step back from (at least not the first couple of times). The primary goal for which everything is done. Without this lighthouse, life itself is lost in darkness, loses its meaning. Any means are good; bargaining is not appropriate. This is what the thoughts of an obsessive or infantile person look like.

The first one has every chance of success, but an absolute obsession with business cannot be developed, inherited, or bought. The second one has a similar vision, but its values and goals are much softer, which is not so bad. The main goal has this status only according to your will. In five or ten years, you will have a different goal, but also the main one.

Why not change it yourself when it becomes profitable or if there is no other way out? Of course, it’s easy to reason. A meaningful rejection of a goal hurts self-esteem. On the other hand, the sooner you get hit, the sooner you’ll be back in action—less childish and romantic, but more experienced and fit.

4. Destructive persistence

Philosophers, entrepreneurs, and politicians celebrate perseverance, but only for those who have achieved success. The rest keep quiet, knowing the bitter truth. It’s just one step from persistence to recklessness. You know, the ram, relentlessly banging its head against the wall, demonstrates enviable tenacity.

Similarly, a person can choose the path of the most severe discipline, follow a strict schedule, and perform the necessary (as it seems) actions. However, this will not bring the desired result closer. Some walls are impossible to break through in principle, while others require special equipment, skills, and knowledge. Unfortunately, patience and hard work will not wear everything out.

Initially, a good saying that motivates young athletes may turn out to be a false pointer in real life. The fact is that there are only two crucial factors in sports: talent and the time you are willing to devote to your favorite game. It’s impossible to have talent in everyday life, and everyone has the same amount of time. Every day we face insurmountable circumstances, random events, and widespread, often unfair competition. In such circumstances, perseverance ceases to play such a significant role and no longer guarantees anything, even theoretically.

5. Probabilities and possibilities

When planning and evaluating prospects, we often get confused about concepts. The success setting forces the values to be rounded. Thus, probabilities are perceived as possibilities, although they are not the same thing at all. The probability that comes into view is in an endless field, where a hurricane can strike at any moment and where there will be nowhere to hide. In addition, due to the lack of landmarks, it is difficult even to determine the exact distance to the target.

Opportunity is always concretized — it’s not an abstract image, but people with names, companies with opportunities, places with names. Probability becomes an opportunity when the keys to all the doors are selected, the paths are cleared of barricades, and it remains to choose — to act or to observe. A missed opportunity does not mean anything, although it will be perceived as a lost opportunity.

6. To step back does not mean to lose

Finally, the most important thing. Retreating or even running away does not mean losing. Anyway, not always and not everywhere. What’s so glorious about a reckless marathon where the main prize is a cup filled with concentrated dissatisfaction? Dedication, suffering, and struggle in the name of an unattainable goal look romantic only on the screens of a movie or on the pages of a book.

Your real life is hardly worth sacrificing. Of course, there are examples of historical figures who changed society and the world because they did not retreat. However, their biographies should not be perceived as an opportunity to repeat — this is not even a probability, but a statistical error. Being ready to compromise, change your mind, and change your current goals does not mean compromising your morals. This is a reasonable position of an adult, a realist who has abandoned romantic prejudices.