The dark trio: Three emotions that sabotage your peace and growth

In many ways, our actions are guided by emotions. Some help to make the right decisions, motivate, and inspire; others only get in the way. During the day, a person can experience a wide range of emotions — from depression in the morning to joy bordering on euphoria in the evening, especially if it is the end of the working week.

A business call, communication with colleagues, a chance meeting with friends — any contacts with people leave an imprint. In a normal situation, emotions are fleeting. A slight joy or barely perceptible disappointment disappears in a matter of minutes. But three special emotions can completely capture the mind, turn off logic, and all analysis. It’s fear, anger, and lust.

The three most powerful negative emotions(Fear, anger, and lust: what do they have in common ?)

Fear, anger, and lust are obviously in different places on the emotional spectrum. Nevertheless, they have a similar effect, pushing a person to impulsive and often unworthy actions. It is possible to identify the characteristic features of these emotions.

First, the focus of attention narrows down to the object or event that caused them. Secondly, internal pressure increases, requiring an immediate release. Thirdly, they substitute priorities. At one point, the most important thing becomes something that you didn’t even think about until a few minutes ago. When emotions take over, we lose our composure and clarity. The mind no longer controls words and actions. Goals and prospects cease to matter; only reactions remain.

Despite all of the above, it should be remembered that none of the emotions is bad. They are not enemies, but rather messengers bringing bad news. Unfortunately, the extracted information is analyzed later, when the emotional state returns to normal. Then you begin to understand what, why, and where it came from. Next, let’s look at each emotion separately.

1. Fear is a survival mode

Upon discovering something frightening, the brain immediately identifies it as a threat. It can be a growling dog that suddenly jumps out or someone’s disapproving look. Fear can be very different and is not always justified by a real danger. For example, many people are afraid to speak in public. The brain shuts down, the body goes numb, and the only desire that arises is to run away, as if from a fire.

Anyway, when you’re afraid, your brain is faced with a simple choice: run or resist. Until a decision is made, the person remains rooted to the ground. In general, this pause is often enough to avoid most of the far-fetched threats. It turns out that they pass by without even paying attention to you.

Fear forces all body systems to switch to a protective high-alert mode. Long-term thinking is completely disabled; it only matters what happens here and now. The main thing is to survive; losses or gains will be calculated later. This is a very effective mechanism from an evolutionary point of view.

2. Anger is a reckless attack

Anger follows resentment, which can be caused by a variety of things: direct insult, disrespect, neglect, or physical attack. Sometimes a simple misunderstanding, refusal of a request, or lack of punctuality is enough to offend. When anger occupies the mind, attention is focused on the source of resentment. But, unlike fear, the attack response is triggered here.

The conversation turns to raised tones, and the body involuntarily assumes a pose of readiness for action. The expressions are becoming more biting, accusatory, and provocative. Anger picks up a person like a big wave and tosses them from side to side until they bring a barely alive body to the shore. It’s good if everyone remains safe and sound by this point, including relationships, reputation, and dignity.

This emotion can be useful. Anger can overcome fear and indecision. Anger leads to heroism. That’s what it was initially for. However, it causes problems in everyday life. Remember any angry argument with a loved one. Visit. A F R I N I K . C O M . For the full article. It always ends in nothing, a completely unnecessary quarrel that will remain in the memory for a long time.

3. Lust — the pursuit of desire

Lust is rarely talked about, even in psychotherapy sessions. This emotion is considered a personal and private matter. However, it’s not just about sex. Lust is fixed on an object, causing an inexplicable craving and desire to receive a reward for the attention shown. At such moments, a person is completely disconnected from reality, remaining at the mercy of attraction.

On the one hand, falling in love can turn into true love, but on the other hand, it is a source of pathological jealousy that never leads to good. Lust makes you idealize the desired object, ignoring the red flags. We are ready to make a choice that we will regret later. Quick pleasure is put above friendship, career, and relationships. The future ceases to exist.

From a neuropsychological point of view, the picture looks like this: all attention is focused on assessing the level of attractiveness and accessibility of the desired object. Nothing outside of the moment matters; reason is suppressed by instinct. The incredible thing is that the desired object does not necessarily have to be real.

Steps to deal with these emotions

When one of these emotions gets into your head, you need to try to slow down the process. To do this, you should practice the technique of adjusting emotions. It should be noted right away that this will not always work. However, the ability to notice your emotional fluctuations is essential. Don’t try to dismiss it, try to understand what you’re feeling and why.

The first step is recognition. When you feel fear, anger, or lust, accept their presence. This activates the areas of the brain responsible for self-awareness, enabling them to regain some control over their actions. Step two — allow yourself to feel it. Emotions themselves are not dangerous; only actions pose a threat.

Step three — take a break. Don’t give up on desire, don’t deny fear. Just don’t take any action right now while you’re not in an entirely adequate state. These simple steps can protect you from the most serious mistakes that can have a significant impact on your entire life.