9 signs that you’re in an unhealthy relationship

Do you think you are in a healthy relationship? Think again. Of course, we hope not, but maybe after reading these nine signs, you will find out that your partner and your relationship is not as healthy as you initially thought.

We regularly see the term ‘toxic relationship’, also called an unhealthy relationship. But what exactly is an unhealthy relationship, and when do you know if you are in one?

It may well be that you think you are in a healthy relationship, but this is anything but true.

What is an unhealthy relationship?

When your partner gets mad at you once, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re in a toxic relationship. Still, when this is often nonsensical or strange, it may well indicate that you’re not in the healthiest relationship. A toxic relationship involves someone (in this case, your partner) questioning someone else’s self-esteem. These can be done through gaslighting, but also lying or playing psychological games.

There are many signs that you may be in a toxic relationship, but there are certainly less apparent signs that you may not be aware of right away. Do you think you are in a good relationship but recognize your relationship, partner, or yourself in one of these signs? Then it may well be that you are in an unhealthy relationship.

Your partner blames you for a problem he/she has caused

A sign that you are in an unhealthy relationship is that your partner blames you for everything and absolutely everything when the problem is caused by him/her. You are almost starting to think that everything is your fault when this is not the case at all. Your partner blames you for his/her problems to get rid of a sense of guilt and responsibility.

Your partner keeps you away from friends, family and other plans as much as possible

Your partner prefers to keep you to himself and will therefore do everything to support you with him. They like to control everything, so they also try to maintain control over who you see and what you do in a day.

Your partner always feels like a victim

Every time you try to put your feelings on the table and be honest, your partner will always find a way to make you feel guilty. Your partner is somehow always the victim, so your partner prevents you from talking about your feelings without feeling guilty.

Your unhealthy relationship affects your mental health

Having an unhealthy relationship, which you unconsciously know nothing about, can cause mental problems. It is possible that you often feel anxious, experience a lot of stress, constantly worry, and suffer from a poor(er) immune system.

You suffer from nightmares

Having frequent nightmares involving your partner could indicate an unhealthy relationship. Your body sends signals that things are going on that you may not (yet) see yourself.

You hide things from your family and friends

Withholding certain things from your family or friends on purposes, such as an annoying argument or a wrong hunch, can mean that you are in an unhealthy relationship. After all, you want your relationship to appear to be going well, but it’s anything but the truth.

Making up excuses for annoying behaviour

It’s far from a good sign when you find yourself making excuses for bad behaviour your partner is displaying. This can be forgetting your birthday, but also ignoring messages or criticizing you. You are constantly trying to develop reasons and excuses that indicate that your partner is not the way he is behaving now.

Your partner prefers to be in control of everything

Your partner prefers to be in control of everything: what you eat, what you wear and what you post on social media. This is a sign that you are in an unhealthy relationship.

You will never date his/her friends

Now it is rare that you switch from your ex to a friend of his/her, but you do not see this at all when you are in a toxic relationship. The people your partner interacts with already says a lot about the person himself so that you know.

In short: Do you think you are in a healthy relationship? Think again. Of course, we hope not, but maybe after reading these nine signs, you will find out that your partner and your relationship is not as healthy as you initially thought.