When things are hard, the help of some family and friends is what helps us get through them and move on. Even if you don’t do well, sometimes just hearing words of encouragement are enough to give you a second chance. But there are other people, even people close to you, who don’t want you to succeed. The reasons aren’t important; what matters is that they want you to fail, especially when you’re getting close to the top. Here are a few ways you can tell that not everyone is happy about your success
They want what you have
No matter how well someone tries to hide it, envy is always clear. Most people don’t know how to hide how they feel. It could be a look that stays on you longer when you talk about your success, or it could be a tone of irritation in your voice.
When someone is jealous, they don’t just want you to fail. They want what you have, so they want you to lose it. This kind of person always thinks you don’t deserve your success when they see it. It becomes clear that no one else should either if he doesn’t have it.
2. They try to put down what you’ve done
When we do something good, we want to let other people know. It’s not always bragging to say that you’re better than most of your colleagues. Often, you just want to show your family and friends that you’ve met their expectations and are different in a good way. People praise us and show how happy they are for us at these times. Some even feel proud to have such a family member or friend.
But some people either cut you off in the middle or speak after you’re done “bragging” and put down what you’ve done. “Well, yes, that’s not bad, but here I ran the hundred-meter run without pushing myself even faster,” and so on. The point of these speeches isn’t to show that there are more intelligent and stronger people but to make fun of the person who is happy for them. Usually, the person who says something like this does so because he or she thinks that only he or she should be the centre of attention and your success takes the spotlight away from him or her.
3. They lie about what they can do
People who are happy for you will try to help you get even more successful. This can come out in ways like giving you moral support or helping you set up a meeting with a very important person.
Even if someone doesn’t want you to succeed, that doesn’t mean they will always say no to your requests. On the contrary, he may show you a level of enthusiasm you’ve never seen before, ostensibly to help you. But in reality, it will just be a front for you to hide behind for as long as possible to put off getting help from the person who promised it in the first place. In the end, it’s just a waste of time meant to get you to leave.
4. They are happy to talk to you about your failures
The person who wants you to do well won’t be happy if you fail or even if you just stay the same. He will be interested in your next attempt to reach your goal.
People who don’t want your success are the other thing. They will talk about your failures for days and take pleasure in any mistake. If you have a big failure, they may act like they feel bad for you, but you can tell they are happy by how they look, move, and show other signs that you can’t hide without training.
5. They’re trying to show that you’re wasting your time
One of the biggest signs that someone doesn’t want you to succeed is if they try to talk you out of your plans with soothing words. Do you think you’re bad at something? Even though it’s bad, it could be worse, so you should now give up on the idea and not test your luck.
These speeches can sound like friendly advice and even say with regret that yes, it’s sad, but it’s best to drop it, so you don’t waste your time and energy. People like that don’t help you get back on your feet. Instead, they get on your back and push you down, pushing harder and harder as they try to convince you that it’s better to crawl than to walk with your head held high. And if someone who appreciates your efforts asks, “Are you ready to fight on?” and they’re helping you, another person who doesn’t want you to succeed will ask, “Are you ready to give up?”
6. They show that you have doubts
It’s natural to have doubts because that’s how your brain looks at information and finds flaws in it so you can avoid bad things. It’s normal for loved ones to try to stop you from doing something dangerous by confirming your doubts.
It’s different when someone backs up your doubts about something that might help you succeed. Also, he tries to make you feel like you can’t get past your doubts by blowing up a small thing and making it sound like a big deal. People like this can try to get you to do anything, like work more and spend less time with your family. The most important thing for them is to show you that your slight doubts are a big problem that you don’t see because you’re so excited about the chance of success.
7. They are trying to take your attention away
The person who wants your success will try to stay out of your way when you are making progress toward your goal. When he or she sees that you are busy, even if the issue is important, he or she will wait or do something else to get your attention and then apologize.
When someone doesn’t want you to succeed, he will do everything he can to get you off track, like sending you many messages and talking to you a lot. Such a message will be long or just noise that doesn’t mean anything. The point of these things is to make you feel tired and spend as little time as possible paying attention to important things.