You are used to hearing beautiful stories about how a person started playing sports, changed his job to a more prestigious one, became interested in introspection, and allowed himself to grow spiritually. But few people know that this is not how the growth process begins. You can’t just live, enjoy what’s happening around you, and suddenly decide that you want to change everything and reach a new level. If everything suits you in your life, you don’t need such changes. You won’t be able to explain why you need to spend your time and effort working on yourself.
In reality, personal growth begins when you are experiencing some internal crisis. You feel the need to change not what is around you but, first of all, yourself and your attitude to the surrounding reality.
We have collected a few things that begin the process of your personal growth. Knowing what exactly motivates you to work on yourself, you can learn to extract helpful experience from even the most negative situations.
1. Breaking off relationships with those who don’t help you move forward
Each person has a certain list of people he loves, and without whom he cannot imagine his future life. Usually, it includes relatives, close friends, and a beloved girlfriend — those people whom you completely trust and with whom you have experienced many happy and painful moments side by side. It seems to you that nothing can destroy your relationship — neither time nor distance nor the people around you. But, unfortunately, the reality is cruel, and you will be disappointed in your loved ones more than once.
No matter how much you communicate with a person, no matter how much you support him, it does not guarantee anything. As the years go by, you change, reconsider your views on life, and set priorities differently. The fact that you have been friends or loved each other for a long time does not mean it will last until your death. The saddest thing is not even the betrayal of a person but the sudden realization that you are no longer helping each other grow but dragging each other to the bottom. To get the latest stories, install our app here
When you realize that your relationship has no future and decide to break off communication with a loved one, you experience severe pain; you are disappointed in yourself and other people. You have a reassessment of values, and you begin to look at the world differently. Having gotten rid of the harmful influence of a person, you gradually recover and begin to work on yourself.
2. Loss of life orientation
In order to initiate the process of personal growth, you must face the loss of life orientations. This happens in several cases: when you are disappointed in what you have been striving for a long time, when the result of your efforts does not bring you what you expected when you lose everything that you have been building for years. Yes, this is a very painful process, and you get the impression that there is no solid ground under your feet anymore. You no longer have anything to start from when making any decisions – and you are inactive because you do not know what to do and in which direction to move.
It is in this state that you begin to analyze your life. You dig into yourself, trying to figure out what you want from your future. As a result, you build yourself from scratch, throwing aside all outdated goals, expectations of others, and unsolicited criticism.
3. Feeling lonely
It is unlikely that the process of personal growth will begin when other people surround you. Many people believe that communication with motivated people who will have dreams and goals similar to yours can lead to serious changes. But, to move forward, you will need to experience a state of loneliness.
When you are alone with yourself, you can truly understand what you are missing. When you are in a company, all thoughts and feelings are muted, and you are focused not on yourself but on someone else. The more time you have to spend alone, the more likely it is that you will sort out your problems, outline a development plan and make every effort to become a better person than you are at the moment.
4. Disappointment in yourself
Disappointment in yourself is the strongest motivator to move forward. Of course, first, you will have to live through all your negative emotions: this will turn into a short period of stagnation for you. You can stop your movement towards your goals, engage in self-flagellation, try to forget yourself with the help of bad habits. But as time passes, you will face a choice: to continue such a meaningless existence or pull yourself together and start changing yourself for the better. To get the latest stories, install our app here
Disappointed, you don’t expect any unrealistic results from yourself. You understand that you will first have to work hard on yourself, analyze in which direction you should move, acquire new knowledge and experience, restore confidence in yourself and your own abilities. This is a long and detailed process that will take a lot of resources from you.
5. Feeling unfulfilled
It also happens that everything seems to be normal in your life, and people around you even envy you. You have a good job, friends, girlfriend, hobbies. But you don’t feel like a happy person yourself. On the contrary, at some point, you even have a feeling of being unfulfilled. Things that gave you pleasure before no longer please you, and you are faced with a tough need to change something in yourself and your life.
Because of the unfulfilled feeling, you can start trying yourself in new areas; you can discover talents that you didn’t even know about before; you can find the courage to do what you wanted for a long time without looking back at the people around you. As your potential unfolds, your life will gradually transform, and you will become stronger and more confident in yourself.
The bigger and more insulting the failure that you have suffered, the more likely it is that your life from its moment will be divided into “before” and “after.” You will have to take a fresh look at everything you did “before” — you will analyze your actions, work on mistakes, revise your goals, and approach their implementation. You may completely give up the dream you were striving for. To get the latest stories, install our app here
One painful failure can start the process of your self-improvement. You will want to become better, expand your knowledge in certain areas, conquer new horizons. Failure will allow you to assess your strength more objectively and stop relying on the help of other people or the will of chance.