Many women are taught from childhood: men are born to behave like princes on a white horse, always and in everything to be decisive and strong, to idolize women, and foresee all their desires. This phenomena make some women finding it difficult on how to ask a guy out in a cute way without sounding desperate.
Of course, this idealized image, to some extent, contributes to the formation of female self-esteem, predetermines expectations regarding the representatives of the opposite s3x.
And, of course, there is a rational grain in him: nevertheless, well-bred, so-called “real” men meet such requirements to a greater extent than weak-willed, lazy, lack of initiative, and rude.
Nevertheless, one should never forget that even a man who can be called “good” by all indicators is just a man. He may be afraid of something or be ashamed of something, not notice something, not think about something.
Therefore, inviting a guy on a date, which is someone’s idea, may be unacceptable and even shameful, objectively cannot be called a bad idea.
If you like a man, as it seems to you, mutually, but he in no way dares to approach you – why not take the first step? A powerful, warm and romantic relationship may arise from him.
What do you need to consider?
Let’s start with a few things that you should take into account if you are going to invite a guy on a first date:
He must be free
Ensure that the representative of the stronger sex you like is not in a serious relationship, much less married. Nevertheless, the invitation and seduction of a “busy” man is a question of a slightly different plan. We will not consider it given the controversy from the point of view of morality.
You need to establish at least a friendly relationship with him
As we have noted, men are just people. And it is pretty tricky for people to agree to a date if they are invited to it by strangers.
Therefore, be sure to prepare a sufficient basis for your first step: establish contact with the guy, periodically throw at least minor remarks with him, learn a little about him.
However, it would help if you didn’t overdo it either to not get into the friend zone.
You must be prepared for rejection
Yes, this is unpleasant, but still: no matter how beautifully and correctly you invite a man on a date, he may refuse you. The reasons may be different; he is unlikely to voice them, and, in any case, you should not take them personally.
The person may have serious inner experiences, trauma due to previous relationships, in the end, he may not find you attractive from a romantic point of view, which will in no way make you less attractive in principle (all people are different, and, usually, everyone cannot please everyone).
If you mentally prepare yourself for the likelihood of rejection, it will be much easier for you to invite a man.
It is also worth noting that you need to properly prepare for a meaningful conversation with the object of your sighing.
Naturally, on this day you should look good and feel good, stay in a good mood. So you will be calmer, and the man will be more fascinated by you, and the cherished words of invitation will fly off your lips faster and easier.
What and how to say without sounding desperate?
Now let’s move on to the options for how you can lead a conversation to invite a guy on a first date subtly:
“Lost” ticket for any event
This may not be too original, but it is a good option. Buy tickets to a movie, a concert, a football match – somewhere that will be interesting for both you and the object of your sighing (at least, based on the information you have about him).
And then tell the guy that you would go with a friend, but she got sick/left / has to go to work, and you do not want the ticket to disappear.
Actually, it will be clear that you have sympathy for a man, but at the same time, you will have room to maneuver.
A softer option for those who do not dare to invite a guy openly is an offer to go and have fun with mutual friends. Again, examples may be different: visiting a shopping and entertainment center to go out into the countryside and have a barbecue.
Perhaps, when spending time together in a closer company, you will be liberated and be able to move with a man to closer and more personal communication.
A hint at the opening of an exciting institution
We are talking about phrases like: “I heard that a new bar had opened nearby, which everyone praises. Maybe we’ll go there together on the weekend to investigate the situation? ”
This is also an indirect invitation to a date, for which it takes a little less courage than clearly and specifically asking a man to date.
Explicit date invitation
This is an option for the most courageous and confident in the responsiveness of their feelings. There is nothing shameful, unworthy, or embarrassing about honestly admitting your love to a guy and directly inviting him to spend time together as a potential couple.
If you’ve read anything about asking a man out on a date, you may have repeatedly come across warnings against explicit confessions. Say, men, for the most part, are shy and embarrassed, so you should not immediately bring down all your feelings on them.
This is somewhat correct, but still, do not go to extremes in such an endeavor. Firstly, as already noted, you can honestly talk about your desire to meet (if you are confident enough in yourself) and not lose your dignity.
Secondly, if you prefer incredibly subtle hints, then you may well get into the friend zone. Getting out of it into romance can be very difficult.
Direct communication, social networks, and SMS
For all its shortcomings, the Internet and mobile communications have given us a lot of advantages. And one of them is the ability to communicate with people at a distance, through social networks, emails, through SMS messages. Writing something frank is always easier than saying it live.
Of course, face-to-face communication in the context of asking a man out on a date is somewhat better than other options. If only because you can see the guy’s live reaction and more objectively assess how much he likes you.
But if it is challenging for you to decide on something like that, get by with a message on the social network, SMS, or something like that. It is better to use communication through devices but still invite a man you like somewhere than to hope for decisiveness in direct contact, but remain silent and leave everything as it is.
If you decide to talk live, then it is better to do it without witnesses when you are alone. It will be easier and more comfortable for both you and the man you like. And, for all the dignity of the first step from the female side, do not forget about self-respect.
Do not beg and beg for this date. And if the man dodges the answer, you can try to interest him one more, a maximum of two times, after which take the lack of consent as a negative answer and stop making plans for this man.
Remember that we only live once, and we must make the most of the opportunities provided to us. Do not be afraid to initiate changes in your life – be frightened of inaction and apathy!